


Jefferson Started It

by thereynoldspamphlet



Series: Hamilton GSA Mess [2]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-12
Updated: 2016-03-12
Packaged: 2018-05-26 04:44:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,363
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6224410
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thereynoldspamphlet/pseuds/thereynoldspamphlet
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Classroom meetings are the next task on the GSA’s mind, and perhaps sending Alexander Hamilton and Thomas Jefferson in together to educate a crowd of freshman was not the most stellar idea.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Jefferson Started It

**Author's Note:**

> The GSA came and gave talks to everyone in our classes at school. I wouldn’t write a horrible sequel to my controversial fic if the 55 minutes I preceded to endure weren’t so terrible that I had to transcribe them and share them with the world.

“Pardon me! I am Alexander Hamilton, and I am here to educate about the GSA and lead a discussion! So you see–” 

Hamilton’s babbling was quickly cut off with a classic Thomas Jefferson scowl and smug revision, “I think you mean co-lead. I’m Thomas Jefferson, GSA representative.” Since Jefferson, in joining the GSA only a handful of weeks prior, had no idea what else to do, it seemed prudent for him to simply shut up. Luckily for him, Hamilton was always more than happy to open his trap every time there was over 3 seconds of silence.

“First of all, I would like to thank Mr. Washington for letting us into his room and his class time!” Hamilton stopped briefly to clap, and was joined halfheartedly by a few students and sarcastically by Jefferson. “Anyway, let’s start this off by having you go around and introducing yourself! Say your name and pronouns,” Hamilton proceeded to gesture to Angelica and Eliza’s little sister, mostly because he was worried he might completely scare off any other freshmen. “Would you start?”

“I’m Peggy Schuyler and… I use she/her pronouns!” she proudly stated, before turning and waiting for the boy next to her to talk, folding her hands in her lap and looking expectantly.

“Uh… I’m Samuel Seabury and my pronouns are straight,” he said with a dead serious look in his eye. Everyone in the class snickered, and Samuel Seabury added, “What? Isn’t that normal?”

Hamilton, now trying to find a happy balance between yelling at this kid or pissing himself laughing, chose to say “Do you not know what a pronoun is? Are you for real?” Before a now flushed Seabury could blunder up a response, Hamilton continued on with “A pronoun takes the place of a noun, in this case, your name. So, my pronouns are he and him. People of different genders use different pronouns, for instance–”

“Hamilton. I think he knows enough,” Jefferson barked out, just trying to stop Hamilton’s never ending words from grating on every single nerve in hid body. Looking over at the next person in the line of desks, he asked “So what’s your name?” This action effectively ended what could have been 55 minutes of Hamilton Ranting™.

Once introductions ended, the real discussion began. “The GSA stands for Gay Straight Alliance, but it actually focuses on all LGBT issues. Can anyone tell me what the L in LGBT stands for?” The room went dead silent. The only sound to be heard was Jefferson writing on the board with a faulty marker that stopped working halfway. He was writing his version of the acronym only got through LGBT and half a Q at the end. Not wanting to ask Hamilton or Mr. Washington for a marker, he glowered while Hamilton finished his piece. 

Finally, one kid in the back shakily rose his hand. Hamilton smiled and pointed at him, trying to follow the very specific instructions of Burr to not take over the conversion by following his motto of talk less, smile more. Burr just, for once, didn’t want Hamilton to dominate the conversation. It was supposed to be a seminar after all. 

Following a few more seconds of awkward silence, the kid stuttered out “Uh… Lesbians?” Simply because there are 14 year olds we are talking about, muffled laughter filled the room. Jefferson couldn’t seem to give less of a shit, but Hamilton looked ready to kill the next kid who laughed. 

“That’s right,” Hamilton calmly said, trying to remember Burr’s advice to not get so up in arms about everything. “Do you know the other letters?”

“Yes. G is for gay, B is for Bisexual, and T is for Transgender.”

Before Hamilton could cut in again to congratulate the freshman, Jefferson jumped in. “But do you know the other letters? Q stands for Queer, which was once a derogatory term for LGBTQIAPP+ people, but is now a blanket term anyone can use,” he stated, moving his mouth as quickly as he could, knowing that any contradiction of Hamilton had a time limit before he would cut in and stop it with a relentless rebuttal. 

“First of all, queer is still a derogatory term used against many LGBT people. You notice how I said LGBT? Because that’s the entire acronym, not whatever ahistorical bullshit you just said–“

“Language!” Mr. Washington’s booming voice commanded.

“Sorry!” Hamilton paused to apologise before continuing his rapid fire response, “The word queer should be used to address people without their consent, especially by straight people like yourself, because they could have terrible experiences with it, seeing as it is a slur!” 

It was at this moment Mr. Washington decided to put a stop to this, as he could see Hamilton balling his fists, and really didn’t want to deal with a brawl in his classroom. “Enough, enough, just move on to the next part of your presentation,” he said while waving his hand, shooing them forward. 

Hamilton straightened himself back out. Well, he made his posture as straight as it could be, as he was still a raging bisexual. “Let’s move onto questions… Please raise your hand if you want to ask anything about LGBT people or issues.”

Surprisingly, a few hands flew up. Hamilton gestured to the first person he saw. “Are LGBT people oppressed?”

Jefferson pounced on the question, trying to prevent this meeting from being a Hamilton Q&A. A lot of Jefferson’s motivations revolve around simply stopping Hamilton from speaking. 

“Everyone is oppressed in some way. LGBT people are definitely oppressed. They have their sexualities or genders shamed by mainstream society. The only place it is completely equal is somewhere like North Korea, because everyone has nothing there.”

For the first time in a long time, Hamilton was momentarily shocked out of speech. Luckily, he quickly regained that ability and started talking at lightning speed, “You have to be joking! Did you just call a dictatorship an equal society? Of course its unequal, the dictator is taking everything from them and oppressing them! I cannot believe that came out of your stupid mouth, you ignorant uneducated pompous French fu–“

“Next question, please, “ Jefferson gestured at some random kid, just trying to silence Hamilton, who was clearly not following Burr’s advice of talking less. The questions kept pouring in, and Hamilton kept answering with longwinded pieces. Jefferson could swear he felt a migrane coming on. 

“What does ace mean?” some poor kid asked towards the end of the period, and Jefferson saw his chance. Hamilton immediately groaned, and allowed Jefferson to speak simply so he could critise him. 

“Well, it’s an LGBT identity that means you don’t feel any sexual attraction.” Jefferson took this moment to run up to the whiteboard once more, grab a new marker off Mr. Washington’s desk, and manually write an A at the end of the acronym. Hamilton simply burst out laughing, as he couldn’t believe in the middle of the presentation Jefferson just added another letter to the acronym, and how perfectly it represented the way the A was jammed in originally. 

Jefferson took advantage of this moment of weakness and quickly called on the last hand, so Hamilton would have no time to argue his last point. Unfortunately for everyone involved, the last person was Samuel Seabury. “Could we use shows like My Little Pony: Magic of Friendship to teach about LGBT issues? As a Brony, I think it would be a great idea.”

This was the precise moment the freshman introduction moved from terrible, to probably the worst seminar held at the high school. Surprisingly, it wasn’t even Jefferson’s fault. He listened on as Jefferson feed Seabury some bullshit answer about how of course it would be a very useful outlet for education. Hamilton started employing some of the deep breathing techniques Burr has suggested. 

Thankfully for all the room’s occupants, just that moment the bell rang, class was dismissed, and both leaders had to go back and report what had happened. As they walked back, they agreed on something for the first time in their life– they absolutely needed to lie to Burr about the results of the discussion.

**Author's Note:**

> Like everything I’ve ever written this is not reviewed by another living soul including myself. Most of the things in this were actually said or done by a real person at my school, except what Hamilton did. Hamilton is everything I wish I did. There is no actual point to this fic… its mostly just crack I would think? Please don’t take it seriously.


End file.
